Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.