he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
