I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
