I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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