is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
