She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Randomize
