he puts the penis in happiness.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
