Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
