he shaved USA in his pubs
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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