She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize