you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
