We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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