Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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