i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
He called his prostate his "boner button".
You left your underwear on the fireplace
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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