you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
