Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
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Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
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