Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
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