Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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