Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
