I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
