Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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