I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
