It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Randomize