How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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