Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
