I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
