Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Randomize
