Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
soo... how was my night?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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