Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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