Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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