why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
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