Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
