sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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