I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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