is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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