that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize