Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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