I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
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