I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize
