we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
