i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
