Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
