i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
