he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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