The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
