I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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