I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
