Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
