I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Randomize
