he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
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