The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
